The Great Minnessota (and Chicago) Get-Together

US & Canada

We’re back from our summer Chicago trip! The last time Randi and I visited the Windy City together was just after Thanksgiving 2021, so this was the first time since leaving in 2018 that I’ve experienced the city in its sunny, joyful, everybody-doing-things-outside mode.

Digression: on the flight there I took Kira’s recommendation and watched Groundhog Day from 1993. I’ve used the term ‘groundhog day’ as a synonym for ‘ugh, here we are again, stuck in this never-ending loop’ for as long as I can remember, so it was weird to realise that this meaning (rather than the actual groundhog day tradition to predict the first day of spring) originated with this film and is younger than I am! Overall, it’s a really fun movie about a conceited and curmudgeonly weatherman who inexplicably finds himself repeating the same day over and over again, and it makes me somewhat nostalgic and sad to live in a world where it feels like these mid-budget films no longer get made. To somewhat balance this feeling out, it should be noted that the ‘sexual entrapment’ angle of this already quite sexist film gets creepier and creepier as you go along, and so I am glad that this mid-budget film would no longer get made today in this particular way.

Also, hats-off to the hilarious moment where the mere knowledge of what an ‘espresso’ or ‘cappuccino’ might be is used to contrast bougie, urban culture with small town, down-to-earth America. The hipster frontier is always moving!

Welcome back to a Chicago summer!
Welcome back to a Chicago summer!
Our downtown foray to the Riverwalk
Our downtown foray to the Riverwalk
In the Loop
In the Loop

Anyhow, back to the epitomie of boughie, urban culture that is ‘staying with Catherine & AJ and their toddler’. It’s always so much fun to be with these three, and this time we really got to appreciate their local park – Winnemac Park – as well as our traditional Channel 4 documentary viewing; this time we binged through Sixteen, a series about Year 11s in Dudley sitting GCSEs (kinda) in the middle of 2021’s Covid-era lockdowns. We also watched the first Republican debate, which was notable mostly for kicking off with a confusing and unnecessary indoor drone sequence.

Aside from an exciting tour of Jason and Carrie’s new home, followed by a very fancy dinner at Parachute (Korean-American, sharing plates, controversial cocktails), we left our other Chicago reunions for the second week because we had a very, very exciting long weekend planned: a return to the Minnesota State Fair!

Catherine has been to every State Fair that she’s been alive for, and surely a lot of this credit must go to her mum Juli (or mom, I guess) who very generously hosted us all in the suburbs of Minneapolis. (I’m not entirely sure how workable this is, but I think forming a book club with Juli is now a life ambition of mine.) While Catherine flew, AJ drove me and Randi up there in order that we could (a) revisit the authentic American roadtrip experience, (b) listen to some extremely violent conservative talk radio in the forlorn hope of hearing some Republican debate analysis (it was all about cultural Marxism instead) and – most importantly – (c) make a mandatory stop for burgers at Culver’s. Yay for Culver’s!

Enjoying our Culver's butter burgers and frozen custard
Enjoying our Culver’s butter burgers and frozen custard
A bucket of delicious doughtnuts
A bucket of delicious doughtnuts

Anyway, when I wasn’t staying up until 1am discussing books, we spent a solid majority of our two days at the fair. I’ve evangelised about the Minnesota State Fair to so many people in the UK, but mostly to bemused faces. So, to repeat, you should go. The food is incredible, and the best things – the cheese curds, doughnuts and cookies – really do come in buckets. On top of that, we tried a bunch of the ‘new for 2023’ offerings, including the bagel/croissant ‘basant’ hybrid and some delicious crab fritters. But we also enjoyed the craft beer, seed art, prize vegetable displays, lumberjack & lumberjill competitions, high school marching bands and overall intensely friendly and welcoming fair atmosphere.

Back to Minnesota and the Minnesota State Fair!
Back to Minnesota and the Minnesota State Fair!
I love how bustling the fair is
I love how bustling the fair is
One of my favourite, aspirational pieces of seed art
One of my favourite, aspirational pieces of seed art
On the SkyGlider over the fairgrounds
On the SkyGlider over the fairgrounds
For the record, I voted for the unglamorous but important child tax credit
For the record, I voted for the unglamorous but important child tax credit

The other thing which really stands out to me about the Minnesota State Fair is the politics. As you can see, we had fun in the Democratic booth voting for our favourite Democratic Minnesotan policies with pieces of corn, but over at an entrepreneurial ‘Dump Biden’ stand other fairgoers were casting their own corn votes for their favourite Republican challenger to take on Biden in 2024. (Spoiler alert: the polls you read are all correct. They want Trump, again, and overwhelmingly so. I’ve seen the corn jars with my own eyes.) It’s not all happy-go-lucky; in fact, even wandering into the official Republican booth now feels physically intimidating, especially when it’s packed with t-shirts glorifying guns. But it’s precisely because the cultural divide is so stark that at least seeing Americans enjoy a fair together is so lovely.

Talking of cultural divides: on Friday night, the four of us celebrated the end of our first day at the fair by going to see Barbie together. This had been planned for a while and I’d deliberately avoided a bunch of spoilers, which was great because I really enjoyed seeing the film’s counterintuitive twists and turns through fresh eyes. This included the refreshing discovery that Will Ferrell’s Mattel boss character wasn’t just a straight rehash of Lego Movie boss, as well as the surprising unfolding of what the tagline (“She’s everything. He’s just Ken.) was actually all about.

It’s all very good, very funny and very meta, and the only thing which gives me pause (aside from a general observation that audience applause in a cinema is always cringe) is that Barbie, unlike the Minnesota State Fair, will never reach across the US political chasm. And I’m not saying that because I think conservatives should watch it “to learn something” (although perhaps they should). Barbie is at its best when its skewering itself, and in a better world Republicans who can’t stand American corporate culture would find a lot to love there! But in all likelihood they won’t, because either they won’t see it or they’ll only hate-watch in a way which strips out all of the movie’s nuance and humanity. (And let’s face it, nuance and humanity are not really in vogue with that crowd right now.) This isn’t Barbie’s fault. But it still makes me a little sad.

In the Skyscraper
In the Skyscraper

Back to the fair and my final story from day two: I had expressed some prior interest in riding the super-cool giant spinny thing (the ‘Skyscraper’, if you want the technical name) but these hints generated zero uptake from anyone else in our group. Nonetheless, Catherine in particular decided that she was keen to see me ride the super-cool giant spinny thing (which, in her words, might also have included the word “horrific”) so I paid for my ride tokens and joined the queue in the hopes that I would find another solo traveller. Happily, a young woman from Texas was also the only person in her group with an interest in flying through the air, and I was very, very grateful to be able to have someone to talk to during my least favourite part of the ride: the “be suspended very high in the air for an indeterminate length of time while new riders are loaded at the other end” phase. She also said she was pleased to have someone else to ride with, but had trusted that God would be looking out for her. Ah, America.

Falling through the air was actually oddly relaxing
Falling through the air was actually oddly relaxing
So, this is my recommendated form of meditation
So, this is my recommendated form of meditation
All together at the great Minnesota get-together
All together at the great Minnesota get-together
Our lumberjack getting trounced in the lumberjack competition
Our lumberjack getting trounced in the lumberjack competition
Sampling lots of craft beer with Catherine's mum, Juli
Sampling lots of craft beer with Catherine’s mum, Juli
We couldn't leave the fair without this...
We couldn’t leave the fair without this…
...Sweet Martha's Cookies and milk!
…Sweet Martha’s Cookies and milk!

On our last night in Minneapolis I broke away from the others to spend the night with Jill, Nate and their three wonderful kids. Jill was a colleague of mine at Groupon back when I first moved to Chicago in 2014, and the person who I had some of the loveliest, most interesting philosophical conversations with in my life over Gchat (remember Gchat?) when we were supposed to be working. She’s also absurdly talented and a massive Sate Fair fan, not only winning the grand champion prize this year for her seed art but also a bevy of ribbons for her jams. I had the blackberry jam on toast at breakfast the next morning, and I can confirm it’s delicious.

It was so, so wonderful to be able to catch-up with her and Nate after all these years, and I was very pleased that my Cadbury Heroes and Jelly Babies made it over the Atlantic in one piece so that I could try and sell the family on British confectionary. (There weren’t many left the next morning, that’s all I’ll say.)

Reunited with Jill in her amazing home
Reunited with Jill in her amazing home

As a bonus treat, our drive home through Wisconsin gave me and Randi the chance to stop by Cat and Brian’s new home just outside of Madison. By this point we were yearning for a meal with some fresh vegetables, and Cat responded to our prayers with an amazing spread – combined with Brian’s homemade bread! – which we were very grateful for. We also got a tour of their home, which included the most adorable couple’s jigsaw set-up I’ve ever seen. Aside from the awkward moment when I almost drank out of Cat’s fox mug (and risked ruining our friendship forever) this was a wonderful playdate for me and Randi, and we were fully refreshed for the rest of the journey back to Chicago when our pseudo-dad AJ swung by to pick us up again.

Chilling in Cat and Brian's garden
Chilling in Cat and Brian’s garden
Antique Taco: one of many, many delicious meals
Antique Taco: one of many, many delicious meals

Last year, after we got married for the second time, Todd and Carolyn sent us an outrageously generous quantity of gift cards for our favourite Chicago spots. So, for our second week, Randi and I spent our days making excellent use of them: Antique Taco, Open Books (one of those old-fashioned bookshops where you’re still allowed on the sliding ladders!) and Janik’s, one of two brunch places which will always be very dear to our hearts. The other one is Windy City Café, which – don’t worry – we also made it to. There I got my usual order of corned beef hash with added blue cheese: an underrated combination. Huge thanks to Toggolyn for our amazing gift card guided tour around the city!

During our second week here we also found time to walk around areas of the city where we each used to live, enjoy an impromptu beer flight at the bar where we had our very first date and cheer on the Cubs at a Cubs vs. Brewers game at Wrigley Field. Much to AJ’s consternation the Cubs won, but the rest of us were delighted. In the evenings we were so lucky to be able to schedule time with so many people we wanted to see, culminating in a big group outing on our final night to Improv Shakespeare. Long-time blog readers will know that this is our favourite thing to do in Chicago, and we were very excited to learn (via a chance conversation with the cast of Shamilton in Edinburgh!) that it was back in the city. This time the audience prompt was Sarah’s Wedding – presumably as part of an inspired bachelorette party – which resulted in a stirring tale of suitors competing for Sarah’s hand via the noble sport of jousting chess. Afterwards we sat outside drinking craft beer in the warm summer air with Todd, Carolyn, Jason, Carrie, Melissa and Rob… a perfect Friday night.

Hanging around outside our old shared apartment
Hanging around outside our old shared apartment
A lively evening - with much cicadas knowledge shared - with Joe, Julie, Amanda, Karol and Colleen
A lively evening – with much cicadas knowledge shared – with Joe, Julie, Amanda, Karol and Colleen
A night by the pizza oven at Robert and Julie's
A night by the pizza oven at Robert and Julie’s
Go Cubs Go!
Go Cubs Go!
They won!
They won!
We wondered if we had a photo from our first date here to compare, but of course we don't because that would have been weird
We wondered if we had a photo from our first date here to compare, but of course we don’t because that would have been weird
Melissa making us deepy envious of the rooftop pool
Melissa making us deepy envious of the rooftop pool
I can't stress how delicious La Scarola always is
I can’t stress how delicious La Scarola always is
With Jason and Carrie at iO before Improv Shakespeare
With Jason and Carrie at iO before Improv Shakespeare

I could probably keep writing forever about how much fun (and weight gain) we had in Chicago, but seeing as it’s already a week later and I’ve had to lock myself away in my old childhood bedroom at my mum’s house to finally finish this blog, I’ll stop here. Huge thanks, as always, to Catherine and AJ for putting up with us while they were trying to work from home, introducing us to the whimsical doughnut guy at their local farmer’s market, taking us to Half Acre for drinks, showing us the best sandwich place in Lincoln Square and generally making us feel like we’ll always have a home in the city.

Also, as usual, I want to quickly note all the fun evenings I had in the run-up to this holiday which I never got a chance to blog about! So thank you to my uncle Andrew for drinks at the Waterside, to Angela for our late-night garden party (with improv dinosaur impressions) and Reema for sending us off the night before we flew with some amazing tapas near London Bridge. And our post-Chicago adventures will have to wait until next time…

We made it! Fair warning: this is going to be an exceptionally joyful blog post, because Randi and I finally made it to the US and back after three whole years of being away. In fact, our United flights were mostly covered by credit from our aborted holiday of April 2020, so we had a lot to pack in.

Alex and Randi
Alex and Randi

Our first stop was LA to stay overnight with Randi’s brother, Alex, and his partner Lia. They kindly shepherded us from the airport to an outdoor restaurant for dinner (because you can do outdoor dining in November in southern California) where we had a lovely time pretending that our sleep wasn’t 8 hours behind where it should be.

The next day, suitably reset, we spent some time together at the Huntington Botanical Gardens before moving on to Randi’s parents in Yorba Linda. This was a perfect place to relax into holiday mode – beautiful gardens, including some fearsome cacti, and all in sunshine.

Japanese garden at The Huntington
Japanese gardens at The Huntington
Relaxed!
Relaxed!
La Brea Tar Pits, near where we stayed in LA
La Brea Tar Pits, near where we stayed in LA

Time for a quick side-quest, though! Before leaving the city, we also worked in a brief window to sneak off to Farmers Market and introduce Randi to my LA cousins Jackie and Jeff. This has been a long-overdue introduction, and they generously treated us to brunch while we made the most of our short time together. A really lovely Glamily bonus.

The first of many burritos during this trip
The first of many burritos during this trip
Back to the pool!
Back to the pool!

The number of books I’ve managed to get through during the pandemic has been shockingly poor, and I’ve now decided to blame being cut off from Randi’s family home in Yorba Linda. It really has become my happy place to sit by the pool and read, occasionally refuelled by trips to In-N-Out Burger (still delicious).

Obviously, it was also great to spend more time with Randi’s parents, and in the evenings we gathered together to keep pace with British essentials such as the Bake Off finale and a creepy Weeping Angels-centric episode of Doctor Who, during which I was pretty sure I could sense an army of malicious statues approaching from their backyard.

The perfect place to spend an evening
The perfect place to spend an evening
The entire nursing team for Beth's post-knee surgery recovery
The entire nursing team for Beth’s post-knee surgery recovery

Just in case this makes it sound like we never left the house… we weren’t that immobile. Our furthest adventure was to Newport Beach for a fishy (in a good way) lunch with Randi’s friend Sonali, followed by a good walk along the beachfront itself. In news which will surprise no-one, we opted to join the small fraction of the population who ride the local 71 bus to Newport Beach rather than driving – and while it’s neither very frequent or particularly fast, I have nothing bad to say about my $2 Orange County bus experience, which was actually reasonably well-used for the middle of the day. And free masks, too, for anyone ‘forgetting’ to wear one – including for the woman who boarded, took her free mask and then got right back off again.

We also went for a wonderful (and quite philosophical) stroll around the local neighbourhood with another of Randi’s childhood friends, Sienna. Meanwhile, Randi cooked an amazing dinner for the Leikens when they came over for the evening, along with Alex’s friends Brian and Gabo, and I can confirm that it was me who finished the chocolate cake the next morning. For Thanksgiving itself, I found myself in the disorientating position of making the salad dressing (despite, y’know, not eating salad) which miraculously ended up being edible. Not quite as edible, however, as Andrew Shelanksy’s ginger cookies which have to go down as one of my Thanksgiving 2021 highlights.

Yup, there are buses in Orange County
Yup, there are buses in Orange County
Lunch with Sonali
Lunch with Sonali
When we reached the beach, we basically ran into the ocean deliriously
When we reached the beach, we basically ran into the ocean deliriously
Randi and Sienna, sitting on top of the world
Randi and Sienna, sitting on top of the world
Coats? We must be back in Chicago.
Coats? We must be back in Chicago.

And finally: Chicago! No matter where we live, this will always be the city where we met and we never plan to be away for such an outrageously long period of time again. Our home base was Cantherine Catherine and Blaine’s AJ’s fancy new apartment, and in addition to all of the running about we did it was just really magical to spend some time again just hanging out, drinking Spotted Cow, streaming Channel 4, revisiting their wedding, stealing pizza slices from the fridge, recreating the entire Geja’s fondue experience with a DIY takeaway kit and arguing about whether ‘takeaway’ is a word. We also enjoyed a Hanukkah latke feast with Catherine’s cousins – and fortunately, we had come prepared with offerings from the land of Peppa Pig to satisfy the youngest guest.

Oh, but we did so much more. We ordered Mexican food with Toggolyn – still, by some distance, the couple with the coolest bookshelves – and then hopped over together to Robert and Julie’s for pizza and wine and incredibly tangented stories. Their two sons are also so, so much fun. We went back to Windy City Café with one of my most favourite ex-Grouponers, Ellen, who is slowly morphing into a European before our very eyes, and hit up our other go-to brunch place, Janik’s, with the one and only Cat “I’m going to move to Madison just as you leave Chicago” Hurley.

Evening engagements included a night out in the ‘burbs with Randi’s former boss and her family, cocktails with Jason and Carrie and Thai food at Michaela and Andy’s flat where an awful lot of opinions were expressed about Omaha. I also took a solo trip on Metra out to Downers Grove for burgers with another ex-Groupon colleague, Mike, although it almost turned into a much longer diversion because I almost boarded an Amtrak train by mistake… which could have been a lengthy error.

We also spent time with our beloved flatmate Amanda, of course – not once, but twice – starting with dinner at the one-and-only La Scarola. They’ve always been suspiciously nice to me there, starting from my very first visit, to the extent that Randi assumes they’ve confused me with someone else. Still, I’ll take it, especially since this visit ended with the owner ripping off a piece of tablecloth for me to write my phone number down so he can “take me out to dinner in London” when he visits.

Anyway – having gorged on Italian food – we reunited with Amanda a few nights later at Joe and Julie’s house which, not surprisingly, is a quirky masterpiece of design. We had an uproariously great night together with Amanda’s partner John and long-time Chicago friend Karol. (Julie’s chocolate and marmalade cake is highly recommended.)

Too excited to wait for Todd for the selfie
Too excited to wait for Todd for the selfie…
...and then decided to lay in ambush together
…and then decided to lay in ambush together
Discovering Chicago's Forest Preserves with Catherine and AJ
Discovering Chicago’s Forest Preserves with Catherine and AJ
"We should be able to cross this"
“We should be able to cross this”
Successful crossing in progress
Successful crossing in progress
Catherine and Randi
Catherine and Randi
Windy City with Ellen (now more pedestrian-friendly outside, too!)
Windy City with Ellen (now more pedestrian-friendly outside, too!)
Randi's former boss, Alison, and her family
Randi’s former boss, Alison, and her family
Heading back on the Blue Line
Heading back on the Blue Line
Flatmates reunited!
Flatmates reunited!
I turned up to decorate Hanukkah cookies with Robert's kids
I turned up to decorate Hanukkah cookies with Robert’s kids
Fondue from the comfort of home
Fondue from the comfort of home
Cat joined us on a Pulaski Park revisit
Cat joined us on a Pulaski Park revisit
I insisted on a photo with Joe and Julie's terrifying Halloween figure
I insisted on a photo with Joe and Julie’s terrifying Halloween figure
A less frightening group shot
A less frightening group shot
Thankfully the correct train to Downers Grove
Thankfully the correct train to Downers Grove
Drinks with the reassuringly unchanged Jason and Carrie
Drinks with the reassuringly unchanged Jason and Carrie

Before flying home on Saturday, we just had time for some excellent Swedish breakfasts before accompanying Catherine and AJ to buy a Christmas tree. (In truth, I think we were mostly there so that Catherine had a secure majority of people whose instincts are to bring home the biggest tree possible.) And then, far too quickly, we were in a cab to the airport. If you’re thinking that “cab to the airport” doesn’t sound like us, you should know that, when I left Chicago in November 2018, Robert very kindly offered up some closet space to store a bunch of books, board games and other possessions until we had somewhere permanent to send them to.

I certainly wasn’t intending to colonise his closet for three years, and – beyond feeling guilty – there was something incredibly gratifying about finally coming back for my stuff, even if it took an unwieldy number of extra bags to do it. Yes, stuff’s just stuff, but it was my stuff… and on the flight back, the sadness of leaving people behind in Chicago again was balanced with a satisfaction that our home in London would now become – in a sense – whole.

Carrying the tree home
Carrying the tree home
Our cab driver despairs at our bags
Our cab driver despairs at our bags

Appropriately, on our first flight out I reached the very last episode of Wicked Game, a podcast series recommended to me by my uncle Andrew which works through each American Presidential election from the beginning. I also picked Finding Dory for my traditional aeroplane animation fix… although, sadly, this time I found the story pretty underwhelming and one dimensional. On the way back, therefore, I went in a different direction and watched the Christopher Nolan thriller Tenet. Probably not the ideal viewing experience for that film, but enjoyable enough. The real shining moment of my first post-Covid international journey, however, was being reunited with a pack of Ruffles (Cheddar & Sour Cream) at O’Hare. Ruffles! I had forgotten about you, but you were always an excellent option from the Groupon vending machine.

It’s clearly time for this rambling narrative to end, because tomorrow we go back to the real world. At least, the real world as bounded by the walls of our flat for a few days, pending the (hopefully negative) outcome of a PCR test. We came home today to a Christmas tree of our own (it’s beautiful), a big Indian takeaway (see, definitely a real word) and the Doctor Who finale: all good reminders of our home here. But nothing makes you appreciate home more than leaving it, and I can’t wait for whatever travel comes next.

This is it! It’s the big summer holiday record of our two-week roadtrip to Grand Teton and Yellowstone National Parks, on which Randi and I were joined by both of our mothers. (We invited them, it wasn’t like an episode of Sun, Sex and Suspicious Parents.) Since we are exceptionally proud of our itinerary, this mammoth post is designed to be something you can follow along if you are ever planning your own trip to these amazing places.

Behold, the map!

A map of our route from Salt Lake City and back
A map of our route from Salt Lake City and back

Table of Contents

A: Salt Lake City, Utah (hidden on the map underneath J)
B: Lava Hot Springs, Idaho
C: Grand Teton National Park, Wyoming
D: Old Faithful
E: West Yellowstone, Montana
F: Gardiner, Montana
G: Bozeman, Montana
H: Lewis & Clark Caverns, Montana
I: Idaho Falls, Idaho
J: Salt Lake City, Utah

A: Salt Lake City, Utah

We landed in Salt Lake City, which is considerably cheaper than flying to a smaller airport, and were met by our mums who had already commandeered a rental Jeep in the brightest shade of lime green you can possibly imagine. It would be impossible to lose this car.

We just hoped this wouldn't attract bison
We just hoped this wouldn’t attract bison

B: Lava Hot Springs, Idaho

Borrowing a trick from our Machu Picchu trek, our first night was spent in the town of Lava Hot Springs where (unsurprisingly) one can take a relaxing soak in the eponymous hot springs and ease into the holiday mood. As you can see we were also all very excited to reach Idaho.

Where To Stay: Bristol Cabins, a very sweet collection of little huts and space for RVs and campers. Spoiler alert to preempt any disappointment: there’s no camping at all in this trip.

Excited for Idaho
Excited for Idaho
Our cabins in Lava Hot Springs
Our cabins in Lava Hot Springs

C: Grand Teton National Park, Wyoming

The vital morning supplies of PG Tips
The vital morning supplies of PG Tips

I don’t have good enough words to describe our four-night stay in Grand Teton. It’s an insanely beautiful place, and is where we found our favourite hikes of the entire trip. It’s also the place we discovered that we can’t leave our mums alone for five minutes without them getting lost or accidentally embarking on a nine-mile walk by themselves. It was also worth visiting the town of Jackson one lunchtime, where we all discovered Huckleberry ice cream for the first time.

Where To Stay: A cabin in Colter Bay Village. Book early!

Where To Hike: The Taggart-Bradley Lake Loop has exceptional views. We also really enjoyed String Lake (which has swimming and beaching options) via Hidden Falls and Inspiration Point. Probably my favourite hike, however, was the Cascade Canyon trail. The first half-an-hour is uphill, but this gets it all out of the way early while also leaving you with a fine feeling of accomplishment.

On the Taggart Lake-Bradley Lake Loop
On the Taggart Lake-Bradley Lake Loop
"Your engagement photo"
“Your engagement photo”
That Time Everyone Ordered Huckleberry Ice Cream
That Time Everyone Ordered Huckleberry Ice Cream
Resting during a hike
Resting during a hike
Runaway canoe
Runaway canoe
Lunchtime
Dinner time
Our team on the Hidden Falls hike
Our team on the Hidden Falls hike
Evening views at Colter Bay Village
Evening views at Colter Bay Village
On the Cascade Canyon trail
On the Cascade Canyon trail
Mum and I
Mum and I
Be careful while hiking
Be careful while hiking

D: Old Faithful

The Old Faithful geyser is the most famous attraction in Yellowstone, and we got here early enough for a front-row seat to one of the regular eruptions. The Old Faithful Inn is also well worth seeing – and a good place to have lunch – and the surrounding walks to other geysers are cool, although after a while you may feel some geyser-fatigue. After hiking in Grand Teton, this is a lot more “touristy” and I am fairly sure that bringing my backpack and bear spray to a paved path thronging with families was overkill.

Where To Hike Stroll: Aside from the Morning Glory Pool, we also walked the path to Lone Star Geyser. It’s a paved path, which was harder on the feet and definitely makes you feel less cool, but the geyser at the end was erupting at just the right time.

Token Old Faithful photo
Token Old Faithful photo
The Old Faithful Inn
The Old Faithful Inn
Over-prepared
Over-prepared
Morning Glory Pool
Morning Glory Pool
Randi felt the naming of geysers had reached a new low by the time we reached "Economic Geyser"
Randi felt the naming of geysers had reached a new low by the time we reached “Economic Geyser”

E: West Yellowstone, Montana

On the Fairy Falls and Grand Prismatic hike
On the Fairy Falls and Grand Prismatic hike

We spent three nights in West Yellowstone as a base for exploring this side of the park. As we started to discover at Old Faithful, Yellowstone does seem a little less orientated towards hikes than Grand Teton, although the rangers will get very defensive if you point this out. They exist, of course, they just seem less well signposted and the official maps are a tad… confusing. On the other hand, the park has a huge variety of sights to see, including animals such as wolves and bison. We got way too close to a bison for comfort as it suddenly marched towards our car and we struggled to find where Randi’s mum had gone.

Where To Stay: Hibernation Station treated us very nicely.

Where To Hike: The Fairy Falls hike begins with views of the Grand Prismatic and ends at the Imperial Geyser. (Well, if you squint at the map a little.) For awe-inspiring views of waterfalls, you’ll want Artists Point to Point Sublime, although it’s also well worth walking down to the Lower Falls for a closer view too.

Randi finds a waterfall
Randi finds a waterfall
A bison finds our car
A bison finds our car
In the Las Palmitas Mexican food bus in West Yellowstone
In the Las Palmitas Mexican food bus in West Yellowstone
I seem to have accidentally ended up baptising my mum in the river
I seem to have accidentally ended up baptising my mum in the river
Wild West Pizzeria. We ended up here twice. On consecutive nights.
Wild West Pizzeria. We ended up here twice. On consecutive nights.
Down at the Lower Falls
Down at the Lower Falls
Bear spray: carry it, know how to look stylish with it
Bear spray: carry it, know how to look stylish with it

F: Gardiner, Montana

Gardiner is home to the original entrance to Yellowstone – America’s first National Park – and an arch bearing the inscription “For the Benefit and Enjoyment of the People”, which is a nice thing to find in a piece of federal legislation. Aside from a few more walks, we also went whitewater rafting on the river. The wetsuits were appreciated.

Where To Stay: A cabin from Black Bear Inn and Vacation Rentals, although staying in the ‘Bighorn Sheep Room’ felt unnecessarily uncool compared to the grizzly bear, wolf or mountain lion rooms next door.

Where To Hike: We walked a good circle to Beaver Ponds – a hike which also produced the loudest snake-sighting screams. There are also boardwalks around Mammoth Hot Springs with views of alien-looking landscapes.

Someone should build an Obamacare Arch
Someone should build an Obamacare Arch
Luscious landscapes at Beaver Ponds...
Luscious landscapes at Beaver Ponds…
...in contrast to the alien landscapes at Mammoth Hot Springs
…in contrast to the alien landscapes at Mammoth Hot Springs
Rafting!
Rafting!

G: Bozeman, Monatana

Bozeman! The town with a definite liberal vibe which my mother fell in love with and declared that she was going to move in and open a French bookshop in. Until this happens, top things to do include the Triple Tree Trail, the American Computer & Robotics Museum (a genuinely amazing place where so many things are packed into a tiny area) and Blackbird (hat-tip: Carolyn) which makes, amongst other things, the world’s most incredible bread.

From here on, we stayed in Airbnbs, which don’t feel quite permanent enough to recommend on here, but nonetheless were all excellent.

Ice cream #573
Ice cream #573

H: Lewis & Clark Caverns, Montana

Underground
Underground

Now this was a cool find! After the national parks I was expecting this state park to feature a couple of caves you could poke your head into. Instead, $12 will buy you a two-hour guided tour through legit caverns. Tours may or may not feature: bats, rat bones, a candlelit recreation of earlier times, that couple who just can’t follow instructions,  much careful handrail holding and a rock doubling as a slide.

The Elizabeth Line city
The Elizabeth Line city

I: Idaho Falls, Idaho

After the caverns we headed back down south, stopping for a night in Idaho Falls. There isn’t a lot to write about Idaho Falls but it does have a nice waterfront and Japanese Friendship Garden, in which a team of volunteers were busy re-oiling the fence under the careful supervision of the head gardener. But the real reason we stayed in Idaho Falls was for easy access to the Idaho Potato Museum the next day. It features the world’s largest crisp! (Now slightly cracked. Not because of us.)

Strong effort by the Idaho Falls Gem and Mineral Society
Strong effort by the Idaho Falls Gem and Mineral Society
The ultimate vacation destination
The ultimate vacation destination

J: Salt Lake City, Utah

Voila, we completed our circle back in Salt Lake City. Not wanting to pass on exploring Salt Lake we left ourselves a day to look around, visiting the Utah State Capitol building (although the legislature only sits for roughly ten minutes a year), the Mormon Temple, the farmer’s market in Pioneer Park (props to the woman gathering support to expand Medicaid in Utah) and eating the world’s best carbonara at Stanza

Slightly unexpectedly for a city of 200,000 people, Salt Lake seems to have amazing public transport. We saw buses everywhere, there’s some kind of ride-share scheme for scooters, and from the city centre we were able to catch a tram out to the airport. Good work, Salt Lake City!

I personally find this 'gate' rather creepy and robot-spider-like
I personally find this ‘gate’ rather creepy and robot-spider-like
Something about carrying an orange flag to cross the road really amuses me
Something about carrying an orange flag to cross the road really amuses me

OK, this was an absurdly long post, and I don’t begrudge anyone for just skimming through the photos. But we had an amazing adventure, and I highly recommend the parks to visit. Plus I knocked off three new states in the process 😉

P.S. I kept looking for an opportunity to shoehorn in the fact that we saw Mamma Mia: Here We Go Again with Amanda the week before we left, but it never seemed like the right moment. So here, without any context, I just want to pay tribute to the scene where a fisherman takes 30 seconds out of the film to deliver a monologue about the perilous state of the Greek economy.

Last week was a busy one! It started with a relaxed and cheerful evening at Wrigley Field where I showed up to watch a Cubs vs. Dodgers game with Todd, Carolyn and Kevin (note, Todd, that no Oxford comma is remotely necessary) which was, to be honest, not really diminished at all by the cancellation – due to rain – of any actual playing of baseball. That’s not intended to be a dig at baseball. It’s more a tribute to the atmosphere and the company.

The next day I turned 29 (I know what you’re thinking, and yes, it is a prime number) and I celebrated with Randi and Amanda by going back to Red Square for dinner. It holds a special yet frightening place in our hearts because after meeting Amanda for the first time and showing her around her prospective apartment home, almost two years ago, we had all walked together along Division Street and decided to “get to know each other” over pierogi. As we walked in, the owner (or, if not the owner, an enthusiastic ambassador) put his arms around my shoulder and invited me (and only me) to the baths downstairs. I declined, somewhat fearfully, and we quickly retreated to the outside tables… but the pierogi were good! This time we escaped without any kidnapping attempts, and I returned home in one piece to enjoy Randi’s amazing homemade chocolate cake.

On Wednesday evening I grabbed a beer with Jonah, who had been sending stalkerish photos of Chicago over WhatsApp, and on the following night I was due for Birthday Dinner #2 at Spacca Napoli Pizzeria with Randi, Catherine and AJ. This was good pizza. If you’re looking for a place which is respectably fancy enough for a birthday dinner, but deep down all your heart desires is pizza, this is your place.

OK, enough prelude, let’s get to Virginia.

Downtown Charlottesville is pedestrianised!

Downtown Charlottesville is pedestrianised!

Charlottesville is a large town (sorry, an ‘independent city’) with a wonderfully pedestrianised downtown area, a historic university and the sort of vibe which produces colourful markets, boutique shops and RBG fridge magnets. So I was very glad we had a good reason for a long weekend visit, together with Villy, to see this for myself and undo some of the mental association between the words ‘Charlottesville’ and ‘murderous Nazi rally’.

The other famous association is with Thomas Jefferson and his plantation at Monticello, which we also visited. As with our visit to a plantation in Charleston, it’s difficult to square the workings of a tourist site (gift shop, shuttle bus, tour tickets) with the fundamental horrors of slavery. It’s even more complicated at Monticello since, whatever you think of Thomas Jefferson (and I am not a fan, for multiple reasons) he’s clearly a historical figure of huge significance and talent.

I can say that the presentation was more historically honest than in Charleston. We were probably lucky in our guide, a University of Virginia student. For example, during the tour of Jefferson’s house, and after giving equal prominence to Jefferson’s acknowledged and unacknowledged children, she shot down one man’s suggestion that Sally Hemings was Jefferson’s “mistress” or “special friend” with a firm “no, she was his slave”. It was a small moment, but a brave one, because it’s not an easy thing to risk a confrontation like that when your job is on the line.

Talking of workplace confrontations: in a Charlottesville taproom I caught up with Brett, a volunteer we met on the 2016 Hillary campaign in Toledo, for a non-hypothetical discussion about what to do when a colleague truly believes that the Earth is flat. True story.

Announcement: I don't like Thomas Jefferson

Announcement: I don’t like Thomas Jefferson

Probably mid-MASH

Probably mid-MASH

The aforementioned ‘good reason’ for being in Charlottesville was the wedding of Chelsea (Randi and Villy’s middle school friend) and Daniel. Congratulations to them! The wedding took place outdoors at a winery which was both incredibly beautiful and very, very sunny. Fortunately, fans were provided. It was also great fun to hang out with Villy, who was very helpful and responsive to my emergency questions whilst doing last-minute shirt shopping at Charlottesville’s TJ Maxx.

Villy, Randi and me at Chelsea and Daniel’s wedding

Villy, Randi and me at Chelsea and Daniel’s wedding

The setting was beautiful (and hot)

I’m proud of this photo

Despite prior forecasts, we never required tents to shelter from rain

Despite prior forecasts, we never required tents to shelter from rain

It's been a while since I was last in DC

It’s been a while since I was last in DC

Finally, on Sunday morning we got the early morning Amtrak to Washington DC and spent the day with Randi’s cousin Ben. Randi’s patience for taking photos around famous DC monuments has worn very thin in the current era, so instead I will use this photo of a much younger me outside the Washington Monument from 1999. At least the monument itself has greatly improved!

The highlight of this day trip – other than meeting Ben – was seeing the official portraits of Barack and Michelle Obama at the National Portrait Gallery. To build anticipation we counted up through the portraits of the 42 previous Presidential office holders first, passing a swift-but-fair judgement on them all in turn. FDR had a line drawing of Stalin in the bottom left, which seems a little unfair.

Randi and Ben at the WW2 Memorial in DC

Randi and Ben at the WW2 Memorial in DC

The sci-fi dystopia to haunt your dreams and/or the Washington Metro

The sci-fi dystopia to haunt your dreams and/or the Washington Metro

To conclude, here is a transcribed exchange between an elderly couple over breakfast:

“Why are we feeling like this?”
“I don’t know.”
“We’ve never felt like this before.”
“I don’t know.”
“You’re feeling homesick too though?”
“Maybe we’re just getting old.”
“No doubt about that.”

You might have thought that we’ve visited all of the Midwestern states in existence by now… and you’d be right. But there is still room in our lives for Midwestern minibreaks! Milwaukee in Wisconsin for example, is an hour and a half away by Amtrak. So, we took off for the weekend, armed with a Groupon for a mystery hotel.

Mitchell Park Domes. Call them geodesic domes and lose ten points.

Mitchell Park Domes. Call them geodesic domes and lose ten points.

In the Show Dome

In the Show Dome

One of the top things to do in Milwaukee is to see the Mitchell Park Horticultural Conservatory or ‘those big dome things’. You are absolutely not allowed to call them geodesic domes. They are conoidal domes, and the Milwaukee County Park System is very clear on the matter. The domes consist of a Tropical Dome, a Desert Dome and a ‘Show Dome’ of rotating exhibits, while outside there is a sweet ‘human sundial’ which invites you to stand on the right month and then have your shadow cast onto a big clock to tell the time. (Actually there are two big clocks, to accommodate Daylight Savings, which should make people angry but mysteriously does not.) Anyway, we enjoyed the domes, although I didn’t appreciate the motorway-strewn walk back into the centre of town. Good setting for a zombie film, but not for walking.

Beer! Cheese! A pretzel in a pizza box!

Beer! Cheese! A pretzel in a pizza box!

Milwaukee Art Museum

Milwaukee Art Museum

The irregular angle of the photograph hints at an upward progression of thought... or perhaps a downward slope?

The irregular angle of the photograph hints at an upward progression of thought… or perhaps a downward slope?

Other Milwaukee activities included Battleship, multiple trips to the Public Market (“you guys were here yesterday, right?” asked the ice-cream man) and the cool-looking Milwaukee Art Museum. There we learned about Winslow Homer’s time in England (lots of fisherwomen) and visited a photographic exhibition on the American Road Trip, which did not make me feel any better about the aforementioned Interstate 94 along which, I suppose, a road trip might take you. We also went to the Chudnow Museum of Yesteryear which explores everyday life from the 1930s and 40s. It was the kind of small museum with enthusiastic staff who follow you around to add commentary, but in a nice way.

An Amazon browse page of yesteryear

An Amazon browse page of yesteryear

Since it’s a little unusual for us to stay in an actual hotel rather than an Airbnb, we decided to complete our wild Saturday night of beer+cheese+pretzels by getting into bed, turning on the TV and working our way through all the TV channels like couples used to do in the olden days. Through this method we discovered the amazing Forged In Fire: Knife or Death, a competition in which contestants turn up with their own knives and work through a knife-based assault course where they, um, basically have to cut a lot of things in half. The best part is that the final part of the course is often a dead chicken, or a fish, or some falling watermelons. Needless to say everybody takes it Very Seriously, even though it seems that the people who turn up with the biggest, sharpest knives are pretty likely to win. Highly recommended.

Thank you Amtrak for getting us back to Chicago in time for La Scarola on Sunday night. Other non-Milwaukee things from the past few weeks include a ‘Run for Something‘ fundraiser (although I was not in the demographic of those whose funds were being raised) and finally watching Moana. I know everybody loved this film, and it is true there are many things to love – particularly the characters, the visuals and the opening few songs. I thought it got a bit slow towards the end, though. If this were the mid-1990s and I was a 7 year old with Moana on videocassette, it’s probably the beginning bit I would have worn out by now with replays. (Fun fact: when I watched Lady and the Tramp again after many years, it was the romantic scene of them eating spaghetti at La Scarola-for-dogs which had been watched so many times it was fuzzy.)