Dominic’s Medium-Sized Review of 2025

reddalek

Annual Roundup

Hanging out in the very early days
Hanging out in the very early days

No prizes for guessing that ‘having a child’ is my dominant theme of 2025. Randi’s pregnancy already seems like a lifetime ago, but I’ll never forget our regular bus journeys to Denmark Hill for midwife visits, scans and movement checks. Thankfully, everything went smoothly and since October we’ve been happily getting to know our son.

Another massive highlight of the year was our two week holiday in China, which I’m so glad we did. In 2025 I was also lucky enough to become a German citizen, in a personal act of rejoining the EU. After many, many viewings Randi and I also successfully moved house… albeit staying on the very same road! And the end of the year I had some major changes at work, which will certainly keep me busy in 2026.

Finally, this year our family lost two of its enduring figures: Sabina and my grandma Doreen. We miss them both.


Travels

On the Great Wall of China!
On the Great Wall of China!
  • Chicago (January) – We welcomed the new year at home with Catherine & AJ playing with Mr. Speaker Bear, counting to ridiculously high numbers and reading Green Eggs and Ham.
  • China (April) – Our big trip of 2025! Heartfelt thanks to everyone who reassured us about going when we worried about the chance of food poisoning in early stage pregnancy. Instead, Randi and I had an amazing time together in Beijing and Chengdu, from high-speed trains to delicious food tours, crazy live music bars and my day trip to Chongqing.
  • Edinburgh & Kirkcaldy (May) – The trip in which Katie & James introduced us to Jet Lag, while Lea and Abi showed us the very worst art in Kirkcaldy.
Chilling with Toggolyn and Dolly
Chilling with Toggolyn and Dolly
  • Chicago (July) – A brief but jam-packed solo trip to Chicago over 4th July. With Toggolyn I struggled to get to the bottom of the Nygard mystery, at Catherine & AJ’s I had a very special first meeting, and with the Dietz family I appreciated a rooftop conversation about parenting while fireworks lit up the sky.
  • Lutterworth (September) – Overnight stay at the very lovely Kilworth House for Ellie and Michael’s wedding!
A snowy Chicago walk
A snowy Chicago walk
  • Chicago (December) – We knew baby’s first flight had to be to somewhere special. So, we closed out the year at the same place we began by flying back to Chicago to spend New Year with Catherine & AJ. This meant our kids could hang out together for the very first time, and I am sure that this will be the first of many, many Chicago trips for our child! So far this one has had plenty of Bread and Jam for Frances, Eloise and My First Carcassonne.

Live!

I have a feeling that this category will basically disappear from next year’s roundup 😂

  • The Merchant of Venice 1936 (January) – Shakespearian adaption starring Tracy Ann-Oberman in an electrifying portrayal of Shylock, which got me thinking a lot about the history of the character.
  • Joshua Radin and Ellen Krauss (January) – A chilled-out night in Camden with some charming American stage presence.
  • Lavender, Hyacinth, Violet, Yew (February) – Bush play which we should remember for its sensitive and nuanced handling of intergenerational differences and buried grief, but actually will forever be known to me and Randi as The One Where The Table Leg Broke.
  • The Score (March) – Brian Cox is Johann Sebastian Bach, and Johann Sebastian Bach is very unhappy indeed to have to meet King Frederick II of Prussia. Impossible to take your eyes off the guy.
  • Live music bars in China (April) – Two crazy fun evenings in Beijing and Chengdu, even though we had very little idea what was actually going on. Like, did the people on stage actually know each other?!
  • Cockfosters (May) – Last year I totally forgot to include The Truth About Harry Beck in my annual roundup. Oops. But this year, I definitely won’t be forgetting this rowdy, zany, sketch comedy inspired show about finding love on the Underground, so thanks again to Steven and Sadie for organising this!
  • The Gang of Three (May) – Ah, this was really, really good! 1970s Labour party titans Roy Jenkins, Anthony Crosland and Denis Healey battle it out for the leadership. (Spoiler: none of them win.)
  • House of Games (June) – I think we all had questions about this adaption of David Mamet’s 1987 thriller about con-men and confidence scammers in Chicago. It seemed particularly odd to water down the original ending so much! But, an enjoyable night out if you can get past the accents.
  • Nye (July) – Thanks so much to Melissa for taking us to the National to see whatever-the-theatre-equivalent-of-a-biopic is about Aneurin Bevan, brilliantly played by Michael Sheen. While it is somewhat hagiographic about the NHS, there was one particularly interesting scene in which – having achieved his dream – Bevan is suddenly overwhelmed by endless, conflicting demands on the Secretary of State for Health… which rather nicely illustrated the need for compromise and trade-off in any healthcare system.

On Screen

  • Severance – Catherine and AJ introduced us to the meticulously crafted world of Lumon Industries at the very beginning of 2025, and watching the first two seasons was easily our prestige TV highlight this year. In particular, the finale of the first season was phenomenal. (Just don’t skip the intro!)
  • Beyond The Infinite Two Minutes – Silly, fun, low-budget Japanese time-travelling comedy, as recommended by Katie.
  • Conclave – My last visit to the cinema, at least at time of writing. I enjoyed this backstabbing story of Vatican intrigue, although it’s pretty superficial and the people you’re ‘supposed’ to root for are still deeply eye-rolly.
  • 12 Monkeys – This 1995 Terry Gilliam film is a clever take on the “send tough guy back into the past after a catastrophe” genre of sci-fi. But my god, the romance is tough to swallow. (Mental note: I still need to watch Brazil…)
  • Wallace and Gromit: Vengeance Most Fowl – Featuring the job-killing robot gardener Norbot, and the return of Feathers McGraw!
  • Thames Water: Inside the Crisis – Wry satirical comedy, set in a world in which England’s water supply was privatised but without any competitive market pressures whatsoever. Some performances slightly over-the-top.
  • Doctor Who – This was a difficult year for Doctor Who. While new companion Belinda showed a lot of promise, Ncuti Gatwa’s second season never hit the same great stride as last year, and ended with a sadly premature regeneration. On the other hand, watching the finale with an enthusiastic audience of fellow fans in a central London cinema was a lot of fun, especially for the scene with Jodie’s surprise appearance.
(Just an excuse to include another photo from China under a 'Jet Lag' theme)
(Just an excuse to include another photo from China under a ‘Jet Lag’ theme)
  • Jet Lag – OK, so when I said Severance was our ‘TV’ highlight of the year, Jet Lag was the thing we actually loved the most, especially during Randi’s pregnancy. We even bought a Nebula subscription to watch without ads. If you don’t enjoy watching Sam, Ben and Adam racing around on public transport and doing challenges, there’s something wrong with you.
  • Landman – Wry satirical comedy, set in a world in which Men are Real Men. (Technically I only watched the first episode of this with Todd, but that was enough.)
  • Highland Cops – Another favourite watch during the evenings of Randi’s pregnancy. You definitely get the feeling that the Highlands of Scotland are policed by a team of about seven people, but they’re all very nice, and there doesn’t seem to be much crime about anyway.
  • Location Location Location Australia – The show we started watching once our supply of fresh UK episodes started to look dangerously depleted. Literally everyone says they’re looking for “open-plan living” like there might be some other kind, but we never see any alternatives.
  • The Bear – Currently we’re midway through the fourth season, and sadly this already feels like a show which has passed its peak, stuck retreading the same ground already covered. Episodes which focus on Sydney remain the most watchable.
  • The War Between the Land and the Sea – December’s five-part Doctor Who spin-off, pitting humanity against the Sea Devils homo aqua. This was very uneven. The scenes of the human baddies were easily the worst part, but there were some good moments with both ‘ordinary guy’ Barclay Pierre-Dupont (unexpectedly called upon to negotiate on behalf of all humanity) and UNIT’s Kate Lethbridge-Stewart. The ending, much like the original Doctor Who episodes which inspired this series, is also just incredibly bleak. There should have been another way…

That Moment When…

...the translations when ordering at restaurants in China were not always perfectly natural
…the translations when ordering at restaurants in China were not always perfectly natural
  • …at Pizza Arte, we finally got my sisters on a call together at the same time to break the big news.
  • …a hospital managed to lose my blood by somehow couriering it to a completely different hospital, even though it only had to move from the 7th to the 4th floor of the building. (And this was not even the first time my blood had been lost this year…)
  • …the National Grid media team belatedly responded to my email, signing off with “hopefully […] your friend group’s harmony can be restored”. It was. Thanks, Anna!
  • …one of the Fantastic Stories I bought home from my mum’s – a favourite collection from my childhood – gave Randi genuine nightmares.
  • …I chatted to Geoff Marshall on a bench at Penge East station while waiting for the delayed Southeastern service to Brixton.
  • …after realising that our local corner shop sold blue Fanta (aka Lilt) I started popping in often enough that a fellow shopper, in the process of buying a can of beer, felt moved to stage a gentle intervention by saying that he “sees me in here buying this a lot”.
  • …we danced to the 8-bit themes from Word Rescue, Mixed-Up Mother Goose, Worms Blast and Sim City 2000. Gotta start ’em young.
  • …Randi just couldn’t stop humming the Snack Zone theme.
  • …our wonderful midwife, Liv, stopped by the ward after the birth at the same time of our previously-scheduled antenatal appointment, just for a chat. My hero of 2025.

Has it been a great year for the world? No, definitely not. But 2025 was a wonderful year for my little corner of it. Wishing everyone a relaxed and peaceful New Year.

The leftovers from a giant stack of buttery toast in the labour room.
The leftovers from a giant stack of buttery toast in the labour room.

Hello from Chicago! I’ll write about this trip once we’re home again, but for now I’m taking advantage of still having my hands free (despite also having a sleeping baby on me) to bring this blog up to date with our Chrismukkah back home.

My first Christmas outing was to listen to carols and general festive songs at our beloved local pub, The Perry Hill, along with a baked camembert, a pie and a pint. (Truly, it’s hard to think of a better combination of things for an evening.) I also enjoyed some seasonal post-work drinks one night with Lee and Paul to bid farewell to the year. The following night, after wrapping up at work, my family descended on Tash and Cormac’s for a very special Hanukkah celebration together.

An amazing Hanukkah spread
An amazing Hanukkah spread
Me and my siblings
Me and my siblings

The last few days in the run-up to Christmas were a little hectic, with us juggling a second round of baby vaccines, a madcap dash to collect his passport from the US Embassy in time for travel, and my grandmother’s funeral on Christmas Eve. A few days before that, the extended family gathered at her flat to say goodbye and – of course – compete in a brilliantly-organised quiz. (My team lost badly, and I still feel bad about my contribution to this defeat. Otherwise, it was the perfect send-off.)

In amongst this we also managed to see Matt, Laura and their kids for a morning at ours, and also spent a lovely afternoon with Reema and my mum. This included an amazing moment at a café in Sydenham where, after Randi and Reema had been discussing the plot of the novel which their mutual friend has just casually written in her spare time, we were interrupted by the man on the next table asking for the title so that he could buy a copy!

More family introductions as we said goodbye to my Grandma's flat
More family introductions as we said goodbye to my Grandma’s flat
A united Christmas quiz team
A united Christmas quiz team
Introducing Aunty Reema
Introducing Aunty Reema
Randi puts the finishing touches on her Christmas Eve strata
Randi puts the finishing touches on her Christmas Eve strata

After all of these comings and goings, we ended up on Christmas Eve with my mum, Tash and Katie hunkered down at ours, ready for our first family Christmas of the next generation. We had such an incredible time filled with many generous presents, some water-based tummy time, several rounds of mutual psychological analysis with the ‘Preferences’ game, Katie’s special Christmas mull, the WILTY Boxing Day special, a sunny afternoon walk up Blythe Hill and – of course – lots and lots of filling Christmas food. Special thanks to Tash for proposing the excellent Christmas ham with Coca Cola recipe, which was delicious!

Katie, mum and Tash
Katie, mum and Tash
Katie's Christmas mull
Katie’s Christmas mull
Too young to understand presents, but not too young to enjoy them
Too young to understand presents, but not too young to enjoy them
Christmas dinner 2025
Christmas dinner 2025
Taking advantage of the sunny spell for a Christmas day walk
Taking advantage of the sunny spell for a Christmas day walk

Like the stock market bubble, the expected implosion of my reading total was staved off this year. In fact, I managed 26 books in total, which is four more than last year! For this I have to credit both our holiday in China and a golden two-week paternity leave which involved a lot of ‘sitting on the sofa next to a sleeping baby’ time. Since neither of these factors will recur next year, I’m still expecting my reading to drop off a cliff for 2026.

Oh, and on a non-book note, this year I also experimented with reading on a new Kobo Libra, rather than my Kindle, in addition to physical books. It’s really nice to have colour covers on an e-reader, even at the cost of some black-and-white crispness, and for some reason Amazon have decided they can’t be bothered to make a device with physical page turn buttons anymore. Also, it’s reassuring to confirm that my reading library works seamlessly between devices, rather than being tethered to one company. So, I’ve been very happy with that change too, even though the truly ‘perfect’ e-reader has still yet to be made.

Fiction

I kicked off the year with Tade Thompson’s Rosewater, followed later in the year by its sequel The Rosewater Insurrection. Set in the 2050s, this trilogy belongs firmly to the ‘alien invasion’ sci-fi subgenre and is centred around a giant, mysterious biodome which emerges suddenly in the Nigerian town of Rosewater. Thanks to the dome’s miraculous healing powers, Rosewater quickly becomes a major site of pilgrimage and begins to assert its independence from Nigeria itself.

In Rosewater, the creeping sense that humanity has already lost to the aliens from the very beginning, despite the invasion’s slow build-up, had strong echoes of The Three-Body Problem, although the style is very different. In the second book, the focus shifts to the mayor’s attempt to formally declare independence from Nigeria. Can the citizens of Rosewater broker a mutually beneficial compromise with the malevolent alien Wormwood against their common enemies? Overall, this was a good first choice for the year, and I’m looking forward to concluding the trilogy in 2026!

Speaking of Cixin Liu, I also really enjoyed Of Ants and Dinosaurs, a short little fable which I borrowed from Katie and read in a few sittings. It’s a wry parable of Cold War-esque paranoia and the terrible logic of mutually assured destruction, with ants and dinosaurs alternating between beneficial collaboration and fierce confrontation. As always with Liu, you also get the sense that he just really, really enjoys figuring out the intricate military details of how exactly the armies of ants are able to wage their wars on dinosaurs, and vice versa. And to be fair, these little details make for a very fun read. Highly recommended!

A series I completed in 2025 was NK Jemisin’s Inheritance Trilogy, completing both The Broken Kingdoms and The Kingdom of Gods. (Yes, if it wasn’t obvious, many of my reading choices this year were made because I wanted to tie up loose ends before having a child!) Overall, I still didn’t love this series, and although the second book showed signs of improvement, these fell away again in the last one. Perhaps the central problem is that having ‘gods’ as protagonists just doesn’t work for me, for reasons not unrelated to why ‘gods’ don’t work for me as a general concept. It feels as if there are no rules, and so nothing really makes sense, because although the gods have Aristotelian ‘purposes’ (which is dumb) there’s no real drama or tension.

It figures, then, that The Broken Kingdoms stood out from the pack for being written from the perspective of a human (a woman named Oree, who is blind but has the ability to see magic) and was about her relationship with ‘Shiny’, i.e. the sun god Itempas made mortal. I also remember my favourite scenes were the ones in which the true terror of Nahadoth, the god of darkness, was made clear. But overall I’m relieved to be done with this trilogy so that I can move on to fresh NK Jemisin worlds.

I hate to say this, but I also have some disappointment around Philip Pullman’s The Rose Field, the concluding part of ‘The Book of Dust’ series which extends the ‘His Dark Materials’ trilogy which I grew up loving. Don’t get me wrong, it’s a major improvement on 2019’s The Secret Commonwealth. We finally get the brave, adventurous Lyra back after the unhappy breakdown of her relationship with Pan, which never really made any sense. And it’s certainly a rollicking journey to the mysterious ‘red building’ in the Karamakan desert, far to the east. A particularly wonderful highlight of the book is Lyra’s encounter with Mustafa Bey – a Turkish merchant whose trading empire stretches far along the Silk Road – in a café in Aleppo. It’s just beautifully written.

Overall, though, the issue is that once Lyra finally reaches her destination there are just so many questions left unanswered. A nicer way of saying this, to borrow from Reddit, is that the ending is “quiet”, which is true. And of course, I wouldn’t expect – or hope – for everything to be wrapped up with a bow. But everything from Lyra’s relationship with Malcolm (heavily built up, then suddenly tossed aside) to fundamental bedrock questions of the series (are the gaps between worlds a mortal danger to us, worthy of great sacrifice to close, or actually… good?) are just kinda left hanging in the air.

At my grandmother’s funeral this month, to illustrate the idea of an eternal afterlife, the vicar used the image of an author writing a book, of which only a single copy is produced and later destroyed. While the particular book is gone, the story is “not really lost” because it emerged from the mind of its author, and so could do so again. And so it is between humans and god. (“It’s not a perfect analogy.”) The obvious, gaping fallacy here, of course, is that an author obviously couldn’t write the same book again, because any work of art is not the product of a static, unchanging mind but a very particular result of particular conditions at one moment in time.

Pullman, naturally, would see right through this shallow theology. But I bring it up because it reminded me of the relationship between his two series. They may share the same author’s name on the cover. But the sparkling magic of ‘His Dark Materials’ can’t simply be reignited decades later, even if its slow-burning afterglow remains a very warm and happy place to be.

Another series which I managed to finish this year was Hilary Mantel’s Cromwell trilogy, which concludes with The Mirror & the Light. This series hasn’t always been an easy read, but I’ve definitely enjoyed each book more than the last. There’s an especially chilling moment in this one – about a third of the way in – when a false rumour spreads about Cromwell’s plan to marry the King’s daughter Mary, and you suddenly start to sense the wheel of fortune turn for this masterful operator. Later, when the King admits to Cromwell that he no longer finds him surprising, and misses Cardinal Wolsey, you feel the floor fall away beneath him. The end comes not long after, accelerated by a disastrous marriage to Anne of Cleves and foreign interests plotting to undermine England’s great politician. (Special thanks to the Redditors who posted their chapter-by-chapter analyses in readalong threads – this made the book much more rewarding to read!)

The Underground Railroad had sat on my to-read list for a long time, and ultimately proved both very easy and very difficult to get through. The prose is nimble and light, but the underlying subject matter – escaping plantation slavery in the American South – is always horrifying. For obvious reasons, I did love the central image of a literal underground railroad, which (smartly) only appears at fleeting moments in the book.

I loved The Candy House, Jennifer Egan’s sequel to A Visit from the Goon Squad. It’s written in the same short-story style, but this time set a little in the future and featuring many of the children of the original cast of characters. I just wish I had a better memory for it all. Honestly, I struggled to keep straight in my head all the interlinked plots and characters from this book while I was reading it, let alone remember how they all fit together with the original. Thankfully, somebody has made a useful character map (here’s a mirror for UK readers) but what I really need is a big visual guide to the two books combined!

Any new Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie novel is something to treasure, so I was very excited when Dream Count came out this year. In the past I’ve always preferred her books set in Nigeria to the US, but this one splits the difference as it moves between the perspectives of four women – Chiamaka, Zikora, Omelogor and Kadiatou – and between Nigeria, the US and rural Guinea. The writing is always superb, and can’t fail to draw you in. It’s the most heartbreaking moments which stuck with me: Zikora’s abandonment during her pregnancy, the diminishment of the bold and brash Omelogor in America’s smug academic culture, and the awful trauma suffered by Kadiatou. But there are a lot of lighter parts, too. Strongly recommended, as always.

The Hallmarked Man was the latest entry in the Cormoran Strike series, and I thought it was a good one! The core plot was maybe not as innovative as the previous two books, but its resolution felt much more satisfying and cohesive, which is a major improvement. More importantly, absolutely nobody is still reading these books for the murders anyway: it’s all about Robin and Strike, and the writing is even more explicitly structured around this now.

Strike definitely comes across as a total dick: constantly scheming to separate Robin from her perfectly lovely boyfriend Ryan. I did feel it was a bit of a cheap plot device to have Ryan (a recovering alcoholic) relapse, since it then softens the more interesting dilemma of whether Robin should stay with him or not. But hey, we finally get a finale with the big confrontation we’ve all been waiting for, and I loved the surprise (but very amusing) role for Pat at the very end.

More entries in continuing series included Stone & Sky, the latest ‘Rivers of London’ installment, or “the one with the mermaid”! Set in Aberdeen, I enjoyed the alternating narrations between Peter and Abigail, although at this point I feel like Abigail comes across as the stronger character. Meanwhile, down at Coopers Chase, I read both The Last Devil to Die and The Impossible Fortune. The emotional core of the former book is Stephen’s deepening dementia, while in the latter Elizabeth is starting to put her life together again. This storyline really helped to soften the most annoying drawback of the series for me, i.e. the glib entitlement of the retirees. Relatedly, Joanna is now my absolute favourite character for finally standing up to Elizabeth. (Oh, and Ron’s grandson Kendrick’s crush on Tia is absolutely adorable.)

You can tell that Arthur Conan Doyle had realised that his usual Sherlock Holmes formula had pretty much been exhausted by the time of His Last Bow, because some of the stories in this collection are pleasingly experimental, such as the expanded role for Mycroft Holmes in ‘The Adventure of the Bruce-Partington Plans’. My favourite was ‘The Adventure of the Red Circle’ because reading it aloud (a staple Domdi evening activity) provided the opportunity for lots of silly accents. Most unusual is the final story, ‘His Last Bow’. Written in 1917, this is an amusing reunion of an ageing Holmes and Watson to foil a German spy. There’s no detective mystery to unravel at all here, it’s just a patriotic contribution to the war effort!

The Wood at Midwinter is a very, very short Christmas story about a saint who wishes for a child and adopts a bear cub. Appropriately, I read it on Christmas Eve. Meanwhile, A Psalm for the Wild-Built and A Prayer for the Crown-Shy is a pair of utopian sci-fi books (the ‘Monk & Robot’ series) from Becky Chambers. It’s set in a post-robot uprising world in which humans have learned to live harmoniously within their natural limits, while the robots originally built for humanity’s factories have retreated into the wild.

A Psalm for the Wild-Built was the first thing I read after our son was born, because I thought I owed him something optimistic for the future. It’s an odd little book. I don’t share the innate pastoralism, but the pairing of Dex (a “tea monk” who travels between villages, making tea and listening to people’s troubles) with Mosscap (a robot who emerges out of the wilderness to check on how humanity has progressed) is really lovely, and clearly a spiritual descendant of Asimov’s Elijah Baley and R. Daneel Olivaw. If I was being critical, I’d say that Ursula Le Guin was much more honest than Chambers about the level of coercion required to make any social system work, even the ones which might seem very attractive.

By a process of elimination, I think I’ve now arrived at my truly favourite reads for 2025: Jane Pek’s The Verifiers and its sequel The Rivals. Huge thanks to Toggolyn for gifting the first one to Randi, which I subsequently borrowed! These books are fun, page-turning thrillers following the life of Claudia Yin, a young New Yorker who loves detective fiction and cycling in inappropriate weather. She joins Veracity, a secretive agency which investigates dodgy online dating profiles on behalf of its clients, and quickly gets drawn into the murky, murderous underbelly of the online matchmaking companies.

The second book loses a point for ending so abruptly on a giant cliffhanger, and in general the biggest weakness of the series is the sheer technical unbelievability of Veracity’s hacking abilities. On the other hand, there’s no need to stop and think about that for too long, thanks partly to the intricate mysteries themselves but also the stresses and strains of Chinese-American immigrant family life. In particular, Claudia’s relationship with her (very tough) mother is a central foundation to the series. But perhaps the best part about the whole thing is Claudia’s love for Inspector Yuan: a fictional detective who, in-universe, is the star of a long-running series set during the Ming Dynasty. I would absolutely read these next if I could, at least while waiting for the third Claudia Lin adventure.

Non-Fiction

Simon Sebag Montefiore has an odd writing style. I wasn’t especially seeking him out, but I was looking for a biography of Stalin and this was well-reviewed, which is how I came to read Stalin: The Court of the Red Tsar this year. (Technically this is a follow-up to Young Stalin, but given that there’s a limit to how much Stalin I actually want to consume, it seemed best to prioritise his ruling period.) What initially threw me, although I did eventually get used to it, is that each chapter felt like reading raw writing notes, complete with all the relevant quotes. I was expecting more of a narrative!

That said, by the end I had a clear sense of how the small, petty corruptions of leadership were magnified to such horrific extremes in Stalin’s court. We’re all familiar with the dilemmas: not wanting to contradict the boss, but also not wanting to seem sycophantic. At root these same instincts also underpinned Stalin’s rule, but led to constant, bloody purges rather than poor business decisions or a losing election campaign.

I read and listen to so much about the crumbling of liberal democracy these days, but all political systems have their own weaknesses, and ultimately the cult of personality is not a durable institution. So, in a strange way, this book left me hopeful.

For obvious reasons, Randi and I both read Emily Oster’s data-driven guide to pregnancy Expecting Better this year, plus her follow-up Cribsheet which covers the early years of parenting. These came highly recommended, although Oster is American and so some of the advice isn’t particularly relevant for British parents.

Expecting Better is the better book, and overall very useful. From memory, the most helpful sections were on miscarriage rates by number of weeks (always good to have the raw numbers) and a clear explanation for why certain foods should be avoided, because it’s helpful to actually understand the mechanism in order to properly judge the risk. (For the record, things like mercury and alcohol are actively bad above a certain quantity, whereas the danger from foods such as sushi is purely the risk of food poisoning.)

I found Cribsheet much less helpful. Partly, this is because while we all largely agree on the outcomes we want from pregnancy, raising a child is obviously deeply personal and depends on the individual parents. The empirical outcomes are much harder to measure anyway, which is why so many of the chapters conclude in a vague, open-ended way. But also, Oster is clearly a naturally anxious person, so a lot of the book is just her talking herself into being more relaxed. That’s good for her, but thankfully this isn’t a problem we currently have, and fingers crossed it’s something we can avoid…!

Unreasonable Hospitality was a gift from the nice people at Booking.com, and I don’t have much to say about it other than some stories were clearly lifted directly into The Bear! This Way Up: When Maps Go Wrong was a gift from me to myself, and an absolute delight. Randi and I have been big fans of Jay Foreman and Mark Cooper-Jones’s Map Men series from the very beginning. We’ve even got a Map Men mug! Happily, this book perfectly captures their blend of self-aware humour and, well, super interesting facts about maps. The whole thing is great, but I think my favourite chapter was the one on Google Maps, and the difficulties they faced when expanding to India. (Did you know that 60% of Indian streets don’t have street names? Neither did Google…)

Finally, on a bit of a whim, this year I read Laura Spinney’s Proto: How One Ancient Language Went Global. This traces the astonishing spread and development of Proto-Indo-European, the singular ‘ancestor’ language to many modern tongues as diverse as English to Gujarati. I definitely won’t pretend to have taken everything in, but it’s very rare for me to read any history which stretches so far back, and so a little mind-blowing to think about modern humans migrating and communicating long, long before any of our ‘historical’ categories of peoples existed.

It’s a good reminder of how impermanent these constructs really are. I also appreciated Spinney’s reminder that it was only 18th century European nation-state building projects which established the idea that monolingualism was the ‘normal’ state of affairs for a country, and that much of the world just doesn’t work this way. (See also “different places are genuinely different” from This Way Up, as above.)

Since I’m not a linguist, I do struggle to spot the difference between ‘these words are clearly connected’ vs. ‘these words are totally unrelated’ just by looking at mysterious IPA symbols. I was also deeply curious about why it’s worth writing a book about Proto-Indo-European but not its ultimate Proto-Human ancestor. This is briefly discussed but then set aside in the intro, but I was interested to learn more. Is it just impossible to say very much? Why can’t we use the same techniques to extend the ‘family tree’ of languages further back? (I’m sure there are plenty of good answers to these questions… they’re just the ones which occurred to me at the time.)

I’ll leave you with my favourite language fact from Proto: the origin of the English word ‘merry’ (as in, Merry Christmas!) evolved from meaning ‘short’. In other words, people were cheerful when their religious ceremonies didn’t drag on for too long…😉

Before I begin: yesterday my Grandma died overnight at the age of 93. She was my last surviving grandparent, which is quite something given that I first wrote this type of post back in 2008.

My earliest memories of Grandma are hazy, but in a good way, as she helped to look after me when I was very young. I’m pretty confident that egg and toast soldiers on the little table in the kitchen were involved, though. Later, armed with my incredible portable tape recorder, I remember going with her to church and recording the service, which she was disappointed to discover sounded “mostly like people standing up and sitting down again”.

My siblings, cousins and I can all thank her for a huge number of family outings, and for bringing a packet of Fruit Pastilles to pass along the row during any theatre trips in case we got hungry between the start and the interval. At home, she hosted many family gatherings – both big and small – and was the central figure around whom the rest of the family orbited.

I’m incredibly glad that she got to meet her fourth great-grandchild before she died, and that she approved of him too!

Grandma with her beloved Slowly
Grandma with her beloved Slowly
There's not normally anyone around to take a photo of this part!
There’s not normally anyone around to take a photo of this part!

We are now hurtling towards Christmas, and after carefully measuring the ceiling height of our new house, we were kindly joined by my mum on pram-pushing duties so that Randi and I could continue our tradition of carrying home the largest possible Christmas tree. It’s a beauty!

Back in November, I also had my celebrated first mulled wine of the season at The Free Press in Cambridge, during a family trip for lunch with Peter Mandler. (Yes, this means our child has now crossed over the London boundary for the first time… and his father has successfully changed a nappy on the freshly-mopped floor of a Greater Anglia toilet!)

All decorated for the season
All decorated for the season
Watching the world rush by
Watching the world rush by

We’ve also enjoyed a lovely afternoon visit from Andrew and Bonnie, and also made it up to Kingsbury for a long-awaited first meeting with Josh, Anna and family. This was an incredibly special moment as Josh and I did always plan to have kids at roughly the same time so as to unlock the possibility of joint walks across Hampstead Heath later on. That’s still in the future, but in the meantime I was very amused to receive Economics for babies as a gift. “It was her favourite book!”

Accepting eviivo's award for Best Technology Product
Accepting eviivo’s award for Best Technology Product

In other news, I was very, very happy to finally give blood again successfully after my ban for failing the iron test expired. It’s good to donate blood, of course, but the main motivation (other than keeping myself in the race with my sisters) was that I could legitimately pick up one of those adorable ‘my dad gave blood today!’ stickers which I have wanted forever.

I was also very chuffed to be chosen, alongside my colleague Patrick, to attend the 2025 Travolution Awards. My company, eviivo, had been shortlisted in several categories but we had no idea we were actually going to clinch ‘Best Technology Product’. Huge congratulations to all of my colleagues at eviivo who work so hard to build something amazing!

Ignore the odd angle, but here I am with my colleague Patrick and Sally from Booking.com
Ignore the odd angle, but here I am with my colleague Patrick and Sally from Booking.com
Randi and the miraculous latkes
Randi and the miraculous latkes

Finally, yesterday turned out to be an extremely strange day. After waking up to the news of my Grandma, Randi and I turned our attention to welcoming the rest of our NCT class to ours for a holiday get-together. (It turned into a real feast after everyone arrived with lots of delicious food, but as a backup we were also ready with an array of premium biscuits: Grandma would have been proud.)

Martina and Will were the first to arrive, and while chatting over the frying of latkes, Randi and Michaela discovered that for a year they had actually gone to the same high school, only one year apart. This is all the more impressive given that Michaela is from the Czech Republic.

Those latkes, by the way, were hands down the best latkes I have ever had. It’s going to be nail-biting on Randi’s next batch to see if she can replicate them.

Martina and Randi after discovering their crazy coincidence
Martina and Randi after discovering their crazy coincidence

In the evening we also popped over to Angela’s for her 50th birthday drinks, although we didn’t join the trip to go clubbing in Balham afterwards. (Actually, I’m not sure we were really invited to go clubbing in Balham. My 50th is going to be a lot more pedestrian.)

Tonight is also the first night of Hanukkah, so we’ll also be experimenting with baby’s first candles!

Time for a few more of baby’s first…

  • …trains! Appropriately enough, his first outing was on our local Windrush line as we made our way to Maria’s 70th birthday party (and north of the river!) via Overground. Awkwardly, some unexpected delays on the way back led to the antique Bakerloo line becoming his inaugural Tube journey, which Josh will be gleeful about. He’s also ticked off the Mildmay, Jubilee, District, Central and Southern trains in the course of a very special visit to his great-grandmother and an amazing lunch hosted by Tash & Cormac in Leyton.
  • …pub! Allegedly, young people are turning against pubs, so we’ve tried to buck the trend by having dinner in the very family-friendly Perry Hill pub nearby. (I mean, it’s so family-friendly that there were also tables of older children doing some organised pumpkin carving for Halloween.) Together with Randi’s family, we also discovered another lovely pub just off Peckham Rye Park after a long weekend walk.
  • …Halloween! Randi got into the festive spirit by buying him two separate pumpkin-themed outfits, which were very cute during their brief outings before he needed changing again. Meanwhile, I discovered that buying Jaffa Cakes is an absolute winning formula for trick-or-treaters. “I really want to take them even though I can’t eat them!”, said one girl. So this is basically a mental note for next year to buy more Jaffa Cakes.
About to board his first train
About to board his first train
A pint at the pub
A pint at the pub

Over the last month we’ve continued to have a stream of visitors, which has been really nice. Our son has now officially met all of his aunts and uncles, plus:

  • Randi’s colleague Dan and his family (who came a long way for a short visit!)
  • Kira, who empathises with a newborn’s existential questions
  • Kirsty and Roger and the enormous picnic of dreams
  • The Three As for brunch and a stroll around Mayow Park
  • Cat and Brian, who were happily in the country on a work trip and made a flying visit to see us!

We also had our NCT group over at ours one Sunday morning, which was lots of fun (especially when our instructor forced us to line up all the babies on the sofa for a photo) and also a great excuse to start eating the incredible inscribed macaroons which Troy sent us. Thank you!

Otherwise, we’ve also been doing… lots of paperwork. We had to wait a while for Lambeth’s next available slot to get his birth certificate, which was the critical piece of paper needed to unlock all of the others. But props to the lovely woman who registered him in a surprisingly pleasant civic building, who also provided a cute “Born in Lambeth” lamb-themed pun-tastic baby vest (free when you purchase 4 certificates!) and a superb piece of British socialisation:

“Do you need to see our marriage certificate?” I asked, because fathers are only allowed to register a birth solo if they are married to the mother.
“No, it’s OK!”
“Oh… I just wasn’t sure how you’d actually know we were married…?”
“Well, you can’t lie to the government!”
“But I’m pretty sure people do though?”
“Well yes… but that’s a crime!”

It also makes me chuckle that my place of birth is listed as ‘Westminster’ (per my own birth certificate) whereas Randi is simply put down as ‘United States of America’.

On a local walk
On a local walk
Bubbe and baby
Bubbe and baby

In non-baby news, we’ve also resumed our quest to work through the entire Jet Lag back catalogue – just one more season to go now! – and, in possibly one of the sadder moments of our lives, decided we’d watched too many episodes of Location Location Location and so pushed the boat out by trying Location Location Location Australia. (Not quite as good, but still very compelling. And you get to see those famous on-the-street house auctions which Kim told us about!)

Shortly after going back to work our department also had a series of in-person meetings, which meant I finally got to meet our teammate Bala after six years of working together! There was also a delicious evening at Inca London, which I’m mostly writing down so that I remember to return here for Peruvian food with Randi someday. Assuming we can find a babysitter, of course…

(Most of) the Connectivity team, together at last!
(Most of) the Connectivity team, together at last!