With every new series of Would I Lie To You? which aired while I was living in Chicago I got ever more concerned that the show would be cancelled before I’d get a chance to go and see it being recorded in person. So when I saw an e-mail from SRO Audiences during one of our overnight train rides in Asia that the ballot for Series 13 (!) was opening I entered straight away and was lucky enough to get tickets for the opening episodes two nights in a row. Since tickets are free this also doubled as a very inexpensive birthday present for Randi. 😇
The show is recorded at Pinewood Studios out in the middle of nowhere, which means a trip all the way to the Uxbridge end of the Metropolitan line and then a 10-minute Uber costing ten times as much for the final bit. Sadly, once you cross out of the Greater London boundary the buses dwindle to near-nothingness and the quickest route is unwalkable due to a missing pavement. (There was a New York MTA bus lying around the studio lot but this is presumably just a prop.) But we had the time and luck to land seats in the very front row on the first night so we got to be right up close to Richard Osman and Jennifer Saunders on David Mitchell’s team, with Joe Sugg and Steph McGovern sitting across on the other side with Lee Mack. (Publishing guest names seems unobjectionable given what already exists on Reddit.)
Being so close to the performers actually made us both feel a little nervous, and in some ways I enjoyed the second night more (with Claudia Winkleman, Guz Khan, Greg Davies and Lucy Worsley) from a safer position nearer the back. From this perspective it also felt more like laughing at a (very extended) TV episode rather than being right in the thick of it, but both nights were incredibly fun and I’m delighted I can now cross live Would I Lie To You? off my bucket list. (Although I don’t actually have a bucket list since it’s much easier to fill it in retrospectively.)
The night afterwards we stayed near the village of Datchet on my aunt Sally’s incredible floating home. I say ‘floating home’ because although this has previously been described to me as a ‘houseboat’ that term made me picture a cramped space on a canal rather than beautiful and relaxed living on the Thames. We also had a good walk through Windsor – bringing back fond memories of GCSE Humanities coursework – which accidentally ticked off a few British tourism boxes for Randi including Windsor Castle (at least from the outside) and some unanticipated Morris dancing.
Like Diamond Geezer I had never actually been to the Ye Olde Swiss Cottage pub by Swiss Cottage tube station (and encircled by an awful roundabout which Westminster council keep trying to protect) so it was a good spot for us to catch-up in person and swap notes on various nerdy topics. At a much bougier lunch the next week in Exmouth Market I caught up with Cat and Matt during one of Cat’s flying visits to the UK since – hilariously – Cat and I have basically swapped places and she is now living in Madison, Wisconsin. At least it sounds as if my advice about Culver’s (i.e. to eat there enthusiastically and often) has been heeded.
I’ve been lucky enough to have had job interviews over the past few weeks at a really interesting range of places – from bigger companies to tiny start-ups – including one which required an afternoon visit to Nottingham. Unfortunately the Castle was surrounded by scaffolding when I was there, but I did establish that the city centre is chock-a-block with trams to an impressive degree. Meanwhile, Randi has now fully locked-down a job which (a) is awesome, (b) was another reason to celebrate at her birthday dinner with my mum and (c) brings us a step closer to actually moving to one of the neighbourhoods we have been scouting. Further parts of South London met with great approval yesterday, East London less so. (But hey, I did make my first TfL Rail journey – a brand which was meant to have been and gone before I ever got back to London.)
Saturday night was a low-key (but enjoyable) Eurovision at Josh and Anna’s, albeit with a bafflingly unmemorable song from the Netherlands winning. I didn’t have a clear stand-out favourite but I did cast a vote for the bouncy Czech Republic boys because I was giddy with the power of being enfranchised again. I also understand those who protested and thought this opinion piece the next day was worth reading on what it says that the Palestinian flag alone elicits such an hostile reaction in Tel Aviv. Having made another opportunistic use of Josh and Anna’s spare bedroom in Kingsbury, we then migrated to Andrew and Bonnie’s on Sunday for a grand post-10K brunch (other people ran the 10K but I helped to eat the brunch) and undemocratic card games.
Finally – and I know this blog has been a bit all over the place – I wanted to pay my respects to Sanna’s dad, Rod, whose funeral was on Friday. I would never claim to have known him well. Parents of school friends are often fleeting figures, but I did meet him quite a few times over the years when Sanna and I were at school together and he was the kind of person you knew immediately was kind, loving and wise. After a long time I was very fortunate to see him again, the Christmas before last, as we all sat around their kitchen table and chatted in the warm family glow. I know he is missed.
One of the things I was most excited to start once we got back to London was the London LOOP, a 242km walking trail around the very edge of the city which is divided into 24 numbered sections. TfL provide a detailed walking guide for each one on their website and last Sunday we kicked off our long journey with Section 15 (Hatch End to Elstree). Then today we made an ambitiously early start for a Bank Holiday Monday to go back up to Elstree and pick up Section 16 to Cockfosters. Both of these sections were at the extreme end in terms of section length (16/17km) so after several hours of walking we were tired and eager for lunch, but it’s a really nice routine to get into and when we finally complete it all I’m not ashamed to admit that I will be printing off the certificate as a prize for myself. Check back in a year or so!
I’m not going to do exhaustive reviews of each walk – there are plenty of better blogs for that. But the first section really brought home to me some things which are pretty distinctive about this country… or at least very different to the US. At one point we tramped through a field which bordered the M1, for example, and it was so tiddly compared to any freeway which cuts through Chicago. You also wouldn’t find any public footpath there which cut through a private golf course, or passive aggressive signs which reluctantly acknowledge your legal right of way.
And, as ever, I’m filled with mixed emotions about the Green Belt. I’m proud that, as a Londoner, you can get on a train and be out in the countryside in half an hour. It’s no doubt a good thing that the city wasn’t allowed to sprawl forever into low-density suburbs. At the same time, I’m just really sad that Elstree South tube station will never exist, and the Northern line will never join up properly as it should have done. Still, so far on the walks we’ve been treated to a good mixture of fields, woods and playgrounds as well as quiet residential streets and outrageous mansions, and I suppose that concreting over many of these would have been the price for a more satisfying Tube map in the end.
Other than starting the LOOP – and, of course, lots and lots of phone calls with recruiters and job interviews – I’ve caught up with my uncle Andrew over a hearty lunch at Arthur’s Café (great place) and had a very meandering and enjoyable tea with Sally. My mum also bought tickets for us (along with Tash, Katie and Cormac) to see Small Island at the National Theatre. I read the book a few years ago and my memory of the plot was a bit hazy, which in some ways is the most enjoyable state of mind for watching an adaption because you have some references but also surprises. I really enjoyed the production, as well as the theatre itself.
Finally, Randi and I spent a morning traipsing around Clapham and Balham and admiring these new areas of London where we might be interested in living. Despite my hardwired aversion to South London it’s also true that I’m looking for somewhere new which we can both explore together, and I can confirm that both of these places seemed pretty… liveable. As attractive as open fields are, though, I can safely say that we won’t be going so far out to actually live on the LOOP 😉
This blog is fifteen years’ old today! Which means, since I am almost-but-not-quite 30, that I have now been blogging for over half of my entire life. (I’m not sure if that’s a cause for celebration or just slightly frightening.) It also means that my blog has now entered a new phase of child development with “a deeper capacity for caring and sharing” and “more concern about future school and work plans”. So in the spirit of caring and sharing, here are a few Easter highlights since arriving back in London last week.
We were very lucky to be able to time our return to just catch Randi’s school friend Melissa while she was still visiting the UK. She wanted to visit Brighton and so we caught the train down for a day trip on Easter Friday, Randi and I both armed with shiny new Railcards which – given the amount of travelling around the UK we’re planning to do – are going to pay off very quickly. We took in all the kitsch of the pier before Randi led us in the direction of Brighton’s “best fish and chips” where she got more fish than she was bargaining for. Later we relaxed in the gardens of the Royal Pavilion. I’ve been to Brighton a couple of times before but didn’t remember how nice these gardens were, helped by the amazing sunshine and enlivened by the bloke wandering up and down trying to sell bird whistles with a practical demonstration.
That night we arrived back at my family home for one of the least convincing Passover Seder nights ever put on by any group of people. I’m still not entirely clear why this happened and Randi was deeply sceptical at the challah bread and salted caramel brownies, but whatever it was it was a lot of fun. One of my favourite absurdities was when I successfully found the afikoman and discovered that it came with a box of Easter eggs.
We also took Melissa to Hampstead Heath (lovely as always) and Camden Market (surely a bad location for climate change protests since the crowd was already so heaving it was hardly noticeable) before she left for Paris, and on Sunday night we moved on to visit Joshua in his new flat in the far-away lands of Kingsbury. I can already tell that moving back to London with Randi is going to inspire me to discover whole new areas of London and I was amazed to discover that a quaint country village – complete with quiet, windy roads – has been nestling a couple of stops up the Jubilee line this whole time. We admired Josh’s huge garden, gobbled up dinner, shared some wine and then fell asleep in his spare bedroom.
While Josh and I have always stayed in touch, I haven’t seen Rishal since… well, maybe 2011 (when he last showed up in this blog) and certainly not since I moved to Chicago. So it was incredibly wonderful to hang out in Willesden’s Beer & Burger (they didn’t have this in my day) and catch up over many years of life developments. Afterwards I walked back to his parents’ house with the hopes of seeing them again, and was rewarded not only with their company but also a large bag of assorted McVitie’s products… just like the old days, when his dad worked for them and would always have boxes of biscuits lying around.
Finally, Randi and I spent a night admiring Tash’s enviable new flat in Shepherd’s Bush over falafel and wine. We’re not actively looking for a permanent home yet, but anywhere we go is being closely assessed for its parks, buses and takeaways…
I’m sitting in my aunt’s kitchen, snacking on Quavers and celebrating mundane achievements like acquiring a new debit card (after leaving my old one somewhere in Cambodia) and having the following conversation with T-Mobile:
“Hi, I’d like to cancel my T-Mobile account as I’ve left the country.”
“Sure, I can help with that. If you’re planning to come back I can just pause your bill.”
“No, it’s OK, I’ve left for the foreseeable future. [awkward pause] I mean, I’m not barred from the country or anything…”
“OK, OK, got it. So I can go ahead and cancel, but just to warn you that your SIM card will stop working immediately.”
“That’s fine. My SIM card is currently in the possession of a Peruvian teenager who stole it from me on a crowded bus in Lima so… it’ll be his problem.”
But before my brain is completely swamped by a reintroduction to London, I wanted to close out our four-and-a-bit months of travelling with some general bits and bobs from our big journey across South America and Southeast Asia.
An obvious question to ask is “what was the best part?” and for overall sense of achievement it’s difficult to argue with the W Trek in Torres del Paine National Park, Chile. It’s obviously easier to hop on a tour but nothing compares to the satisfaction of carrying your tent, clothes and food along on your back for five days, even if it wasn’t always enjoyable at the time…
Interactive Destination Map
20 Different Transport Modes
Aeroplane, car, bus, coach, train, bicycle, minivan, tuk-tuk, motor boat, catamaran, ferry, kayak, basket boat, dragon boat, slow boat, subway, metro, cable car, pick-up truck, feet.
Four Extreme Photos
If GPS is to be believed, here is the furthest north, east, south and west that we went and snapped a photo. (Fair warning: furthest north is particularly unimpressive.)
Concept stolen from DG. Disclaimer: some photos may lack proper GPS co-ordinates blah blah blah. I did my best.
Public Transport Smartcard Nerd-a-thon
I ended up with six different cards in total. Bangkok’s Rabbit card is the clear winner in terms of cute design, but the downside is that it only covers one of the city’s three rail systems and none of the buses. Singapore was the only place organised enough to sell three-day tourist passes at our port of entry, while Kuala Lumpur loses many, many points for charging a ‘reloading fee’ every time you want to add more value onto your card. Not cool.
47 Accommodations
By default we stayed in AirBnbs, with a mix of the “staying in someone’s back room” type which Catherine and AJ find so awkward to whole apartments and repurposed hotel rooms. On top of that we also slept in a couple of hostels, four sleeper trains and one tent. Our most ritzy accommodation was definitely Marina Bay Sands in Singapore and for extreme relaxation it has to be the Ten Moons Resort in Koh Lipe.
Special shout-outs to Mary in George Town who kept insisting that everything was better in the Philippines and to Sophie in Laos who nonchalantly told us her crazy stories about babysitting pumas in the Bolivian jungle and bare-metal 48 hour bus rides. Apologies to the man in Puerto Natales who we tried to evict from a room that was rightfully his. And we will try to forget about the family who played acoustic guitar together outside our bedroom at 3am before – for some reason – poking their heads in our room.
The “watch a Disney film on the plane” tradition
My flight home Disney entertainment was Ralph Breaks the Internet, a gleefully self-referential sequel to Wreck-It Ralph which still manages to tell a decent story but is basically wasted on children who are not going to appreciate any of the best jokes. Highly recommended for your next flight, and be sure to stay through the end credits.
One moody black-and-white photo from Angkor Wat
Full Index of Blog Posts
13th April 2562, Bangkok.
The night before we had acquired our arms from a nearby dealer. It was a necessary act of self-defence to protect ourselves from trouble but also signalled our own commitment to fight, and we familiarised ourselves with our new weapons with a hastily arranged target practice back at base. This was not enough to protect me from a first strike the next morning on neutral ground – a victim of some ill-disciplined young fighters who found excitement in an unprovoked attack – but the majority of the battle was confined to designated combat areas other than some stray shots from passing vehicles. Some, like us, came from abroad but the majority appeared to be locals who had been looking forward to the scrap for some time. They expected the fighting to last for three days.
We arrived at the scene, suitably uniformed, to a war of all against all – but the majority of us formed a slow procession, not a scrum, as we marched along the road. At unpredictable moments the crowd would break into a roar, in a surge of emotion, or descend on a single victim with the passion of the mob. But much of the battle was marked by remarkable self-discipline fuelled by a shortage of ammunition. Profiteers enriched themselves by selling extra rounds by the side of the road, although they remained vulnerable to attack themselves and were frequently hit. Only the police seemed immune to fire, guarding the site but doing nothing to prevent the carnage before them. I regret to say that my weapon was no match for better-armed opponents who fired with more powerful guns, and I came away thoroughly vanquished but proud of the small part I had played.
I had a great time at Songkran.
Joking aside, Bangkok’s multi-day New Year celebrations (based on the Buddhist calendar) is so much fun, and the entire 5km length of Silom Road is blocked off for the giant water fight you can see in my hastily snapped photos. Even more charming, though, are the kids who wait eagerly alongside ordinary roads, ready with buckets of water for any passing vehicles or pedestrians. Of course, this only really works in a hot country where getting soaked is not going to chill you – it’s nice, actually, that a tradition is so naturally rooted in the particular geography and climate.
Other than water fights, we also enjoyed wandering through the Songkran celebrations at Lumphini Park, where we bought dinner from some of the many food stalls and sat watching musicians perform as the sun went down. But otherwise, part of the reason we turned our Southeast Asia route into a loop from Bangkok (which we visited a month ago) was that we wouldn’t feel a great pressure to explore one last place. Instead, we’ve been trying to lay the groundwork for a return to ‘normal life’ by applying for jobs and suchlike. Which is not that interesting to blog about 😉
And… that’s it! Tomorrow morning we set off for the airport and a direct flight home to London. I am planning one last wrap-up post about our whole adventure before this blog returns to its usual frequency. If you’ve been reading specifically for this series then I hope it has been enjoyable/helpful/a source of silly photos. Goodnight!
Jeff DuBowe on Haarlem globetrotters: “One of our favorite spots. Super walking city. I think we were the ones who told your In-Laws about it…” Oct 14, 15:15
